book blogger · Review time

Mental Health Monday #4

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Mental Health Monday was set up by my lovely friend Rebecca over at Bexcapades who you need to go follow now pretty please.

The idea came from Rebecca revisiting her depression diary from 2015 and deciding to share her experiences to show that light comes out of dark times.

So now, every first Monday of each month will be a Mental Health Monday where everyone can share their own experiences and a handful will be featured on Rebecca’s post each month.

If you want your post featured in Rebecca’s post, then make sure you share it with her on Twitter and mention her in the post, linking back to her blog.

I only ever seem to write about anxiety because that is my most prevalent mental health problem, so here goes again…

I thought I would write about my own personal signs of anxiety today. You won’t notice them unless you know me well and by that, it seems to only be my mum and my Fiance that notice.

First of all my hands, I suffer from eczema so when I get anxious I end up scratching my hands or fiddling or just generally making my eczema worse by rubbing my hands. I don’t mean to do this but it just seems to be soothing or at least something to keep my hands busy when I’m feeling the claws of anxiety digging in. I don’t even notice I’m doing this until they’re red raw and sore and either my mum or Fiance says Mel, STOP.

Another thing I seem to do is push my hair back off my forehead. Strange I know, but it’s as if I can’t stand anything on my face so I need to pull it back. Like I use the palm of my hand and push it off my forehead repeatedly. I have no idea where this comes from but it’s like a stress response and I automatically do it, even if I do look like a fool.

I also start to fiddle when I get anxious. So it goes back to that incessant need to DO SOMETHING with my hands. It will normally be the zip on my coat or the ends of my top or the sleeves. I have to keep my hands busy just to release that anxiety.

Finally, I fix my hair constantly. I no sooner take clips out and put them back in and I’m fixing my bobble. Then I push my hair back and take the bobble out etc. I can’t not touch it when I’m anxious, I know it’s silly but unfortunately, in that moment, I can’t rationalise. My brain goes to mush and I just have to do these unnecessary things to balance the anxiety out and release it in some form.

Again a very special thank you to my friend Rebecca for setting up this meme and giving people the courage to speak up about mental health. Feel free to comment if you share any similar anxieties, this meme is all about talking and promoting awareness of mental health.

Agony Aunt Mel

 

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